Tag Archives: nightmare

A Recurring Nightmare

I don’t have a lot of recurring nightmares…

They’re more recurring themes of nightmares. But there’s one that I keep having that really messes with my head.

It’s the nightmare that I don’t have enough credits to graduate college.

I think it stems from the fact I was terrified while I was in college that I wouldn’t graduate on time. THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT!! If you need an extra semester or year, that’s fine. But for me it was the idea that I wouldn’t graduate on time due to ONE credit.

My college required a certain number of credits of language. I don’t have a strong affinity for learning another language so this was very difficult for me.

I took French in High School, but I barely passed that so I thought I’d start over with a different language and one that I already knew a few words of (thanks to band).

ITALIAN!

The first professor I had……was AWFUL. He was Italian, but his class was just a lot of memorization. I literally had a final that was memorizing the Little Mermaid in Italian and saying it back to him. And no, I don’t mean translating the Little Mermaid and then saying it to him. He gave us the story in Italian and we had to memorize it.

I learned NOTHING in that class. I learned more when I worked an opera in Italy and lived there for a month.

BUT THAT DIDN’T COUNT TOWARDS MY CREDIT!!!! I lived in Italy for a MONTH and my college wouldn’t let that count for ANYTHING towards my language credit.

But luckily I earned all but 1 credit towards the language requirement from that AWFUL class which meant I still had to take one MORE semester of Italian, but I refused to take the class with that teacher.

Luckily I wasn’t the only one who thought this and he was fired before my senior year. So I got to take the remaining class I needed with a different professor who ACTUALLY taught it. He was also, VERY understanding. I explained to him I was a theater major and how I lived in Italy for a month. This was the last credit I needed to graduate and he was a little more lenient on me grading-wise.

I passed and graduated on time.

BUT BACK TO MY NIGHTMARE!!! The reason I said this nightmare messes with my head is even when I’m awake I feel like I didn’t earn that credit. I didn’t really earn the credit and shouldn’t have graduated.

And even though it’s been 8 (almost 9) years since I graduated I still feel like that. I still think I’m going to wake up and realize I’m still in college, struggling to earn that last Italian credit.

 

It’s also a bit of my Imposter Syndrome mixing with my nightmare…….feeding on the anxiety and stress to become a powerful Nightmare WIZARD!!

Zombies? Really?

I had a nightmare…

It was out of nowhere. I haven’t watched anything with zombies or talked about zombies in months.

AND YET!!

I had a nightmare where I was the leader of a group of survivors. We were living in (randomly) the house I lived in Indiana. One of the survivors wanted to take one of our cars to find…food? Or maybe it was one of her children who ran off…I don’t really remember.

Anybut, I told her it was too dangerous and she sat on the porch step as I walked inside.

Next day, I was checking the security fence (electrified apparently?) and realized it was powered down and zombies were approaching, a  huge horde. I sounded the alarm and all the survivors ran into the house.

As I joined them, one of our cars pulls up and I angrily yell at the survivor I spoke to the day before. I tell her to close the garage door and run inside.

Inside, we start blockading the doors and windows. Everyone is taken to the basement except for a handful who go upstairs to take sniper positions.

I go to the basement and we block the door with bookcases and a chest of drawers. Everyone is told to be silent and we wait for the horde to pass.

However, as I check on the survivors, I notice one of the windows (which are covered to keep the zombies from seeing inside) has a hole in it and I see a decomposing eye peeking in.

I quickly grab a knife and stab the zombie, killing it and luckily its body keeps other from seeing inside.

Then I woke up…cause I think the zombies were ¬†about to break in and my fear woke me before everyone stared dying.

It was the first very detailed dream I’ve had in a while. A full 3 or 4 scenes I remembered. Usually it’s a cacophony of scenes that don’t make sense together.

Earliest Nightmare

Do you remember…

The earliest nightmare you ever had?

I do.

And I know it was the earliest nightmare because I was still in a crib.

Back story: I apparently was very picky about toys when I was a baby, but if I could’ve told my parents about this nightmare clearly, I’m sure they would’ve understood why better.

Anybut, back to the nightmare.

I remember being in my crib and I looked over at a shelf that was…preeeetty high up on the wall across the room. Sitting on the shelf were a number of toys, but the most important toy for the purpose of this story is a Teddy Bear.

It was a very nice bear, from a German company that I can’t remember the name of (but if I do I’ll edit this post at the bottom with the name). It was a normal little dark brown bear with a pink bow on its…left ear? right ear? left ear.

It wasn’t a very nice bear this night. It’s head decided to turn towards me as I stared at it…before pulling an Exorcist…and spinning all the way around. Then it fell from the shelf to the floor.

And that was the nightmare. The strangest thing though was the next morning, my parents found the bear on the floor….

BUT that was enough to make me hate that teddy bear toy for many years. I literally wouldn’t allow it in my room until I went to college. By then, it was more of a nostalgic thing…one of the earliest gifts from my parents as I left them for my new life as an adult…college student.

So, yeah, that was the earliest nightmare I can remember. I have another nightmare to share with you all another day….that one doesn’t have a relatively happy ending, though.